A friend of mine pointed me towards this discussion forum when I first got engaged. Initially I visited the site for wedding planning ideas. At first I just lurked, in fact I did not even register as a user. For awhile this was enough, I looked at people’s ideas for invitations, centerpieces and dresses but never felt the need to comment or to post.
Then I started following the etiquette drama that undoubtedly comes with planning a wedding. I was looking at how others dealt with guest list issues and seating plan obstacles. Finally, when I was encountering some issues of my own, I registered and began posting and asking for feedback. I was still a rare poster but I could not back away. It was clear that I was addicted and there was nothing I could do about it. I figured that once my wedding was over I would be able to leave the forum gracefully. However, this was the farthest thing from the truth.
Not only is there a wedding planning section to this forum but there is an additional section called Babybells that has proven to be far more addicting for me than the wedding component. When I got pregnant with my son I started actively participating in a thread with other mothers due at the same time as me. It was a place to discuss and overanalyze what was happening to us with a group of people who were going through the same thing and who really seemed to care. I could talk or read about things with the ladies on this forum that I had no one else in real life to speak to. The group has stayed active even after the birth of our babies. I enjoy participating and seeing how others are handling the trials and tribulations of motherhood. This is particularly important to me because I am the first in my group of friends to have a baby so there were not a lot of people in my real life that I could relate to at the beginning. I have gone from a lurker, to an occasional poster to a more regular poster as a result of my participation in this thread.
Babybells takes up far too much of my time but I just can’t seem to back away. The question is why? I suppose the answer is that it fills a need in my life and I get the support and reassurance I am looking for. Seeing that others are going through the same thing as me helps me work through the tough times. I must admit that now that I have friends with babies and have met mothers with children the same age as my son my need for the forum is much less. I spend far less time on it then I used to.
Now that I am frequenting the site as part of my social media experience, my approach has changed. I find myself really thinking about what posts I choose to read and why. I also am looking to see why some posts get a huge amount of views and responses and why some hardly get any. I am also exploring the patterns of responses from certain users. More on these issues as I get a better picture of what is going on.
